From the cradle to the grave, we experience change every single moment. Yet we often fear and resist change because it involves the unknown. Notice, do you use phrases that include:
I always …
I never …
This might indicate a sense of being stuck in a rut.
As humans we have a tendency to keep creating our lives from our past. Our routines and habits become set. We give ourselves labels and let these be reinforced by others around us.
So for example, you might think of yourself as strong and capable. Others define you as that too. Then it can be difficult to show vulnerability when you no longer fit that label.
Each day we drag along our past – not just events that have happened, but beliefs about ourselves, feelings and thoughts. Time and again.
We regurgitate old thoughts and belief patterns. And if they’re negative or self-limiting, then we are not allowing ourselves to experience graceful change and live a fulfilling life.
Exercise for change: Head to heart
When your thinking mind is circling round in anxiety, worry or negatives, try this shift:
- Place your left hand on top of your head and notice how that feels. Then bring your hand down and place it on your heart centre. This is a visual reminder to move from your busy head-space down into your tender, open heart space.
- You can do the same with your right hand, placing it at your Solar Plexus. Here you may notice swirling anxiety, knots, butterflies, a need to be in control. Yet simply let go of that by lifting your hand from your abdomen and place it over your left hand.
- Both hands are now connected with your heart space. You have created pathways away from mind and abdomen.
- You can now settle for a few moments on your heart. This is the place to connect in with your inner warmth and self-compassion.
- Build up your inner trust and intuition. Move forward from your heart space instead of a place of fear.
Graceful change is the key to life
Your biography becomes your biology
It’s easy to see this if you think about your eating habits or exercise patterns. What you choose on a daily basis, becomes you! But this is equally true of all your other thinking and feelings. Your brain happily repeats pathways of behavior.
Each of us has the capacity to rewire our brain’s circuitry from its old habits. One of your most potent skills to enable this is mindfulness. Use your conscious intention for change.
It’s not easy, because we are all creatures of habit. Yet it is empowering to remember that you are in charge of your reality!
Change entails new ways of thinking, doing and being… A new state of being creates a new personality … a new personality produces a new personal reality.
Exercise for change: Feeling Ahead
Create the feeling ahead of any experience.
- Imagine you are attending a meeting or event and you feel nervous.
- Beforehand visualize yourself feeling happy, at ease, confident. Sit with these feelings so that you can really embody them.
- Then when you arrive at your destination, you are experiencing this instead of the alternative which is to feel anxious and fearful.
- Notice that you are in charge of what qualities you carry with you as you arrive.
Nature’s cycle of life reminds us about change
Nature is a great example of gracefully navigating change.
We notice the cycle of life outside our windows every day. Just like an everflowing stream, we too can be flexible, fluid and flowing. Staying static and stuck will not help us live the vibrant lives we really wish.
For nothing is fixed, forever and forever and forever, it is not fixed; the earth is always shifting, the light is always changing ….
So since nothing is fixed, our point of power is in every mindful moment. We can access all potential that arises in the moment.
Your awareness gives you the power to create change.
Don’t drag the past along with you every day. Graceful change is the key to a fulfilling life!
If you are contemplating change in your life or feel you are stuck, you may find it helpful to work 1-1 with me here.
The excellent book which is all about change: ‘Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself’ Dr Joe Dispenza
How to Ride the Waves of Change
How to Change your Life through Mindfulness
Interview with Andy Puddicombe: How to Achieve Change through Mindfulness
Yvette Jane – Mindfulness & Meditation Guide